Read John 20:19-23
The room was hot and cramped. Fear can bring out the worst in the human body. We disciples were gathered together, as Jesus had asked us to be. Unless what we’ve heard is simply not true, or worse, a set-up. Could it be possible that Jesus is risen? We each sit in our own silence, going over the events of these days in our minds. The amazing season of living and traveling with Jesus, our teacher, our rabbi, our friend, have ended, and in such a horrible, annihilating way.
On the evening of that first day of the week, when the doors were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood in their midst and said to them…
I cannot breathe! He is here! Are my eyes fooling me? Am I hallucinating, seeing what I so long to believe is true? Can this be real?
“Peace be with you.” When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side.
Peace? Impossible! What I am experiencing must be the outer limits of exaltation! Victory! Hosanna! He is here! Here, with his wounds! Here, with those eyes that can see right into the depths of my soul, and still love me! Here, and alive!
The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I sent you.”
In an instant the solemnity of the moment changes us, and we are opened to Jesus’ words, to His gifts, to whatever He is going to do or ask us to do. If He is sending me to the far reaches of the world, I will go. I will not think twice. This is Jesus. But more, this is Jesus, RISEN.
And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit.”
The heavy stillness is gone, but the solemnity of the moment expands, enveloping every tiny movement of body and soul. Jesus breathes out; we breathe in. Jesus gives; we receive. The Promised One has come; fear flies away. A fire is lit that is incomprehensible in its power to do good: to heal, to free, to bring this Jesus to everyone He sends us to.
Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them, and whose sins you retain are retained.
The part we will play in Jesus’ story of salvation has been laid out for us. My natural mind is overwhelmed at the prospect, but the fire He has lit goes so far beyond the natural that I am able to trust and to know that this is truth.
We fall in worship, no longer aware of time or place or anything except this fire of pure love, this Holy Spirit, breathed on us by the risen Jesus. We arise after this time of swirling, swimming and being absorbed into the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and Jesus is gone.
His absence is more of a confirmation than a loss. His past words come to mind. He told us He must return to the Father. If he did not, the Spirit, the Advocate, could not come. My heart is torn in two to not be able to hold onto Jesus who is dearer to me than my own life. But the pain feeds this new fire, this new presence, this Holy Spirit alive in me.
I will trust, I will be sent. I will forgive, heal, teach, and set prisoners free in Jesus’ name.
It has begun. Alleluia!
Take some quiet time to place yourself with the disciples in this scene. What are you experiencing through your senses? What are you feeling? What is Jesus speaking to your heart? Is this what you expected? How will you respond?
Lord, this moment in time is for us, too. Thank you, Jesus, for giving us the Church and inviting us to be a part of it. We breath in your Holy Spirit and accept our own mission to be sent. We will heal, forgive, teach, and set free. Most of all, we will love. With the power of the Holy Spirit we will do all you call us to do. Amen.
Photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash
